To no one’s surprise, being an immigrant is one of the hardest experiences a person can go through. I recognize that I’m very privileged to have done so in a very comfortable position, I moved out of want, not necessity, I went to college, and there hasn’t been a day where I didn’t have a roof over my head and food in my belly.
However, as time went on, the hardships seemed to grow stronger. The thrill of being freshly moved to the city started to die down, a lot of my friends moved back home, and I started to dive into the world of apartments, bills, side jobs and the imminent countdown that hangs over your head when you’re a VISA holder. As all of these factors kept feeding into the idea that I was, in fact, losing myself.
Parts of my life that felt elemental back in the day, started to feel more like a distant memory, no more pan dulce during breakfast, cafecito after lunch, spending time with friends and family casually after work, curing a hangovers with the group chat, rather than in isolation, and the general feeling of that characteristic warmth of my home being blown away by the desolate New York winter. Until the BWS came around. And I couldn’t help but wonder, could this be the chance for me to build a home away from home?
I want to start by saying that I am a huge nerd. I love taking classes, I love having a schedule, and collaboration in the learning process is the fastest way to get me to sign up for everything. What got me through the doors at Pearl Studios that day was all the information that I knew I would gain if I were to be chosen, but I gained so much more than that.
The more I spoke to my peers, the more I realized that we all chose to go beyond because we yearned to be part of something bigger than ourselves. In that room, every single person was moved by the desire to share their art with someone else, to make them part of their journey. Friendship was blooming in every corner, laughter echoed through the halls, and you could feel the joy that came from the collective sense of belonging.
The feeling of sharing meals together, making plans after class, grabbing coffee, congratulating someone’s work, making weekend plans, and looking forward to seeing each other every morning.
By the time I’m writing this, it’s been a couple of weeks since I finished BWS. International friends went back home, and the lovely group that made me feel like I was back in high school had to rejoin their “adult” life. However, we all know something in us has been changed together, for the lovely time that we get to share it, we have a community that pushes us forward. We have new friends that keep cheering us on as we move on to new projects, who are always down to sharing dinner, catching our next performance, going to class together, and to ride this lovely part of life in which we all allow each other to be and share for the time being.
Just recently a big group of us saw each other again, at a BWS+ Workshop (obviously!), we shared a coffee after class and for a brief moment we weren’t “struggling artists hustling in New York City” anymore, we were just people, people with feelings, hopes, fears, dreams, and an aching desire to enjoy the little things in life, like spend time with the ones we love on a Saturday morning.
As everything else in New York, it might eventually come apart, as we continue to evolve and wonder in life as artists. But I will never forget the group of people that offered me a light as I walked down the dark tunnel that immigration can turn into.
When I look back to my time in New York I know BWS and R.Evolución Latina will be a lovely chapter to speak about, since they were the ones who gave me the joy I needed to keep believing in my dream, and to realize that home wasn’t as far as I thought, not really.